If you’re looking this Christmas for hope, love, family and redemption – have I got news for you.

Loco Engineering: Goodness breeds more good.
“We plant oak trees so there will be tire swings for toddlers we will never meet. We are good for the sake of goodness, but goodness breeds more good. The job of humanity is to plant – and to cultivate – the seeds of humanity. Why? So someday – every day – there will be strong branches for toddlers to swing from.”

Photo by: TimER

I see things no one sees. I say things no one says. I do things no one does. Someday that will matter. For now, it just is. But when it’s Christmas, I write Christmas stories. This year I wrote a lot of them.

If you’re alone this Christmas or if you’re stuck in an airport or if you just have some time to read – have I got news for you.

This is Willie’s Christmas this year, in the order the stories appeared:

Dusty: An elegy of hope and love. – How to get the hell out of Hades and rebirth humanity in Phoenix, where it belongs.

How I got thrown out of Walmart at Christmas for unauthorized salesmanship. – A guide to buying your son some fatherhood for Christmas.

Fifty Shades of Bubba: Christmas at The Sex Addiction Clinic of Misfit Celebrities. – Six degrees of diabolical, with all the names you know and love.

Ladybug’s Christmas dismissal: “The best argument against women in the workplace? Women in the workplace.” – “The best lack all conviction, while the worst are full of passionate intensity.” Like that, but with barflies.

Blow Hard: How The Meshugonoph Grabbed Festivus. – ‘Die Hard’ by way of ‘The Three Little Pigs’ by way of ‘The Grinch.’ There’s a Master’s Degree worth of other literary and cultural references in there, among all the rude jokes. (Here’s a printable PDF rendition.)

Cultivating oak trees – for Christmas: “Unbroken things can survive unbroken forever.” – A toddler teaches a Brophy Boy how to stay married forever.

Need even more Willie? Who doesn’t?

I wrote a lot of other stories this year, along with a lot of non-fiction. Besides Dusty, I have two other new books on Amazon:

Las Vegas Redemption: Pastor Trey Coyle and the reincarnation of Sarno’s Ghost. – A satirical Vegas pastiche with no women, no liquor – and no gambling.

Traindancing: Bedtime stories for your inner child from The Mall of Misfit Families. – Brother Willie is Loco Willie, too, a loco engineer – a man just crazy enough to think he can change things.

I write what no one else writes. I can tell by my bank balance it’s not for everyone. But if you’re looking for brand new ideas about hope, love, family and redemption – have I got news for you…

PS: One more, because there’s no such thing as too much Willie for Christmas:

The true story of Christmas? Joseph didn’t dump the baby and ditch Mary. – C’mon… If your blasphemy’s not good enough for Christmas, what good is it?

This entry was posted in Splendor!. Bookmark the permalink.